Happy Birthday, Elle!
Quote of the Day: “You simply will not be the same person two months from now after consciously giving thanks each day for the abundance that exists in your life. And you will have set in motion an ancient spiritual law; the more you have and are grateful for, the more will be given you.” Sarah Ban Breathnach
Every year, I go with my “Sues”, three in fact, Sue O., Sue B. and Susie and we trek all the way to Park City for an annual shopping trip. This is where I learn each year, because I forget in the intermediate months, how to shop, I mean really shop. Each Sue has her own unique “shopping” talents. They are all much more up to the task than me. Under their tutelage, I have learned to spend hours at TJMAXX. Sue B. is especially adept at looking behind objects or back under every shelf and she is rewarded by discovering some great finds. There is probably a correlation between the way one lives their life and the way one shops. I tend to make decisions quickly- I know if I like something immediately or not but because of these friends, I have learned to slow down and take more time thinking about the objects, picturing who they would go to, how they would be presented and then making an informed decision. I’m definitely “shopped out” by the time I get home.
A few years ago, we were eating dinner in Park City- we were talking and laughing and the waiter was being very friendly with us. During one trip to our table he asked us where we were from. Apparently, he didn’t think we were from Park City and so we thought maybe he thought we were from some big city and so we challenged him to guess. Immediately, out of his mouth, “Evanston”. If you don’t know, Evanston, Wyoming is a small, rural town about an hour out of Park City. Needless to say, we left a very small tip!
This year, the temperature had dropped to -4 degrees by the time we got back to the Park City condo around 10:00 P.M. We sat by the fire and sipped hot-chocolate, opened gifts and tried to warm up. I love being with these friends- their friendships are truly what kept me positive during my 2011 trials. Each of them checked up on me continually and made sure I was ok, in every way, physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. You can’t buy friends like that! I appreciate that they too can’t believe what kind of year I’ve had. They make me feel good about the way I have dealt with this crap, Sue O.s words.
I think of my sister, Lynne, often and am comforted that she too had such dear, loyal friends. Her friend, Sherri, gave my Mom and me beautiful frames with photos of Lynne. Mine was a collage with pictures of Lynne, living in the present with her best friends. A lot of smiles all around. Lynne’s hair is short, like mine now and curly, she is dancing with friends, sitting in a golf cart, wearing a fur cap. It makes me happy when I look at the collage. Yesterday, I was flipping through my sent messages and I came across a message from Lynne and it stopped me in my tracks. I ache for people who have lost a loved one because those reminders always take my breath away. It’s a strong dose of reality.
At times while I was with my friends in Park City, my mind would start to wander- I would think about the future and wonder if I’d be in it. I start to feel like the “odd man out”, why me kind of attitude and have to calm myself down and stop myself from going there. I’m quite certain that heaven is a wonderful place to be, I just want some more time on earth especially to see my children and grandchildren grow up. I want to be here for births, baptisms, graduations, weddings and all the in-between. All the moments that really matter.
The other day, Maggie was making lasagna with me and in her most darling 4 year old way, she said something about when I was sick and she was going to say the word “cancer” but she stopped short so I said it for her and we talked about me being sick and that I had medicine that helped me to get better. In that short instance, I was amazed that she was empathetic enough to stop on the word “cancer”. Mary and Nate are awesome at preparing her for situations- I know they would tell her how she needed to act when I had surgery and she always took it to heart. She’s my “snuggle, watch-a-movie and eat-popcorn-girl”. She’s hooked on the movie, Rio and she laughs and laughs and then hides when the scary parts come on. And then there is Kate- yesterday she insisted that I hold her- she’s so beensy that I could grocery shop with her in my arms. She would get her face right up to mine and look me straight in the eyes- like she was trying to see who I really am. Then she endeared me to her forever when she didn’t want me to leave. She held out her arms and cried. Today, when they come for a visit, I will be living in the present, enjoying each moment.
Joanie and the “Sues”. Trying on hats at TJMAXX- $99.00 fox fur, oh my! Susie, Sue B., Sue O, Joanie
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