Friday, February 11

Taught school today.  Sent an e-mail to the vice-principal, Danny Stirland, to let him know that I may need help next week w/ assembly if I have to have surgery.  I explained that they had found a lump in breast and lymph nodes and he immediately called me and told me not to worry about a thing.  He would help in any way he could.  I could tell that he felt genuinely sorry for me and that meant a lot to me!

My MRI was scheduled for 3:00 P.M.  I met Joe at home and then we drove down to the IMC Hospital and went into the Eccles Building.  They got me right into the room, put an IV in my arm and then got me ready to go into the capusle.  I have a fear of tight, closed-in spaces.  I had an MRI a few years ago to see if there was an issue w/ my leg since my hip was bothering me when I ran so I knew a little what to expect.  This was different in that you laid on your stomach and had a bar between your breasts.  The whole procedure took about 40 minutes.  You wear ear plugs but it is so… loud in the capsule.  I didn’t want to look into the capsule before I went into it in case it raised my fear more but I think I should have because after they pulled me out, I thought that it wasn’t that bad.  They have an IV in your arm so they can send some liquid in your veins and watch it go into the tumors and it’s reaction.  I had to really concentrate on being calm and not letting my emotions and fears get the best of me.  I found myself running through fields of flowers w/ Maggie and Kate and then spent a lot of time on Jackson Lake sunning myself on the boat or jumping in the water remembering the sensation of the cold, clear liquid on my skin.

I was so relieved and proud of myself when the procedure was over.  I felt a little hope that it was behind me.  Today is Mary’s 29th birthday so Joe and I drove downtown to Vinto’s restaurant and got a great booth that would fit the family for dinner.  Joe and I got there around 5:10 and it was buzzing by about 5:45 and then would have been a wait.  I was very hungry and ordered minestrone soup which was delicious, warm and just what I needed.  Everyone else came and we had such fun!  Seeing Maggie and listening to everything she tells me makes me so happy to be her Grandma.  I just want to hold Kate and look into her blue eyes.

Mary has been incredibly sensitive and helpful in listening and offering help and advice.  She told me that the success rate of being cured from cancer is really high and more money is spent on breast cancer than any other.  I can tell she and Nate are worried but trying to be hopeful.

Sue Buehner, Nate and Mary organize a fast for me this Sunday.  I love the spirit of fasting and how that Heavenly Father hears our prayers.


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