Quote of the Day: “Give your hands to serve and your hearts to love.” Mother Teresa
Saturday, Sue O., Cokie and I ran 8 miles. This is the furthest I have run since about two years ago. My foot started hurting me pretty seriously in winter 2010 and as runners often do, we allow some pain, usually too much, hoping whatever is going on will go away. This did not and before long, I could feel part of my toe dislocate when I ran. When doctors looked at it, they quickly diagnosed “Predislocation Syndrome”, something no one has ever heard of. It is genetic, of course, and upon looking at my mother’s feet, it was clear where it came from. I knew the surgery would take me out of running and tennis for a few months and so I waited until September 2010 to have my foot operated on. They shortened the bone on my second toe and inserted a rod to keep it steady. I was teaching at Skyline and used a kneeling stool with wheels to get around on. Little did I know that this would be the start of my “seasons” of surgeries. This week I logged 20.04 miles. I really have to give a shout-out to my body. I really can’t believe that I can run as long as I can without getting tired after all the surgeries I have been through.
I am still working on losing 7 more pounds. I am keeping the 3 off and heard today the name for what I am doing by using my blog to be accountable. It’s called a “Commitment Device” and here is what Freakonomics Radio says about it: “A commitment device is essentially a clever means to help you commit to a course of action that you know will be hard. For an individual, this might mean losing weight, quitting smoking, or anything else involving willpower. To understand how a commitment device works, Steve Levitt proposes that you imagine two versions of yourself: the current you and the future you. As Levitt explains: Sometimes it’s the case that people know that their future version of themselves will want to follow a behavior that their current version of themselves is not comfortable with. And so we make a deal to punish (or reward) ourselves if the future self doesn’t follow through on the current self’s promise.” I do this all the time but my future self doesn’t always obey. Isn’t this one of the hardest things about living? We have this ideal or dream that we want to achieve and at one time we are excited about achieving that dream but then the reality of it all hits and the other self doesn’t want to sacrifice what’s needed to accomplish the dream. Wow, life is harder than I thought! Anyway, I am hoping that my future self with work with my current self and lose 7 pounds.
I love the memories of the day. Today I stopped by Lincoln Elementary in Salt Lake District, school to my Tennis & Tutoring kids and there was a class sitting on the stairs in the multi-purpose room and as I walked by glanced quickly to see my favorite group of boys. One saw me and I heard him say “There’s Joanie”. So I backed up and waved at them. They were all together, good buddies listening to the speaker. I seriously love these kids.
Tomorrow, is my cancerversary. February 7, 2011. I don’t know if I will ever forget laying on the table in that dark room, waiting for another radiologist to come in and look at the lymph nodes under my arm and then examine further to find a lump. I tried to still myself, telling myself that it would be ok, praying for comfort and peace. Somehow, a year has passed and today when I played tennis, I felt normal. I feel strong and healthy as if my life is coming back into focus. Sue O. said the other day, when our tennis friends were all together, that it felt like the earth had returned to its orbit- it was off for a time but now is back.
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